||[May. 28th, 2010|03:36 pm]
I'm Max, 19, assigned female at birth, and genderqueer/fag/drag queen-ID'd. For several years now, I've been playing with the idea of physically transitioning. I felt like i had to decide between living as a woman and living as a man, and that seemed like an impossible decision to make. Then, about 6 months ago or so, I found out about the possibility of going on T to get the desired effects, then stopping before things advanced so far that I began being read as male 100%. I have been talking about this with various people, including my therapist, since then. The idea continues to intrigue me.
Most of the (man-ID'd) trans guys I know who are on T said that they had an awkward "in-between" period sometime during the first 3-12 (since of course, this is one of those YMMV things) months. I want to get to that point, then stop. Looking about 50/50 or maybe 60/40 male/female would work for me. I realize I can't control how people see me, but I know I want to present myself in a way that feels comfortable and feels like me. I want a body that I can present as male or androgynous (maybe occasionally female if I have to) depending on the day and the situation I'm in.
I am well aware that nobody can predict or control the effects of T on any given person. I know it's pretty much a crapshoot and I may end up with acne for 6 months before any facial hair grows in, for example. Looking at how puberty went for the men in my family, I'd guess that I'd probably get acne (mostly "bacne" since my brother was covered in that all through high school), then grow sideburns and a little bit of body hair. I also doubt my voice will drop very low, which is good, but it's also not something I'm terribly worried about either.
1. I have heard that going on birth control after stopping T helps skin clear up faster. Is that true?
2. Do the masculinizing effects of T on the face remain after stopping T? I've heard different things about this.
3. I read that hair "continues to grow" after T is stopped--I assume this means that any new hair growth will remain and those follicles will continue to be active. But does this mean additional body hair and facial hair can continue to grow significantly well after T is stopped?
4. I've also heard from some people that new hair growth thins out after T is stopped. Is this just kind of another YMMV things?
5. One of my biggest concerns, though it's only one I've heard about from 1-2 people in some random internet community, is that after stopping T, the female body won't be able to support the increased vascular needs of the enlarged clitoris, making orgasm extremely difficult to achieve (similarly to cis men whose testosterone levels drop as they get older and make it difficult to maintain erection). Have any of you guys experienced changes in arousal, orgasmic ability, sexual sensation, orgasmic sensation, etc after stopping T?
Thanks to anyone who has an answer to ANY of these questions! I'm also going to discuss this with a doctor but I'd like to gather more information before deciding to go see one.